Tuesday, May 6, 2008

Terrible Tuesday - Vanity

So I'm jumping on the bandwagon (or would that be carousel?) of this Seven Deadly Sins Carnival. Lunanik has the graphics, and the Mr. Linky Love.

Interesting tidbit about the Seven Sins. I once had a professor tell me that all of the characters on Gilligan's Island are based on the Seven Sins. We went through, and named them all, but it's more fun to do yourself so have at it if you so desire!

Today's sin: Vanity

I'm not vain in the most commonly used sense of pride in my appearance. Not because I'm so satisfied, mind you, but because I can't afford it. I've briefly wished (more than once) for a b00b job - to look like I did when I was breastfeeding. Or a tummy tuck or some type of arse firmer - to take off these past 10 years. Alas, I cannot afford it so the thought doesn't last too long. I'd definitely be taking my jazz class again if I could afford both the cost and the time it takes, but life saw to it that it just wasn't going to happen anymore. So I give up on that type of vanity.

I'm vain in the sense that I need constant reassurance - I use the word "validation" a lot as a form of rationalization. And while I do feel that emotionally, we could all use a little validation, a little empathy from time to time, sometimes I fear that I just need it too much.

It is a balance thing, I think. We need other people in the sense of, what kind of life would we have without others? But we also need to be happy with ourselves alone, too. And I don't just mean in the "single" sense. I mean, just being content with who we are, faults and all.

I used to be afraid of this need for validation. I fought therapy last time prior to going back because I felt like I should be able to get through this on my own now, that I shouldn't need to pay someone to talk me through it. And, truth be told, this has been going on for over a month so I have tried to deal with it myself. It's just not enough.

This time, I'm not fighting it. This time, I'm saying, "yeah. I'm weak. Help me." Is it progress or regression? I'm not sure. But I do know it's real. And I can accept this sin of vanity. Hey, here in L.A., my vanity could be a whole lot worse, right?


Kori said...

Is that vanity, or is it just a fact of life? I am loving reading everyone else's posts about this, but you notice I am not jumping on the merry go round!

Jeff and Charli Lee said...

I'm going to give the Gilligan thing a shot - but I have no idea if this is right.
Lust: Ginger
Gluttony: Skipper
Greed: Mr. Howell
Sloth: Gilligan
Wrath: Mrs. Howell
Envy: Mary Ann
Pride: Professor

April said...

Jeff - close, but not what I recall. We thought Mrs. Howell was sloth, and Gilligan Wrath. Also, Gilligan doubles as the Devil as well (hence the red shirt).
Let me just say, this is most likely just an urban legend, but still fun!

Anonymous said...

Hmmm, I don't know that looking for validation is the same thing as being vain. I would tend to see it the other way. The vain woman is so self possessed that she doesn't need validation... she seeks it for pleasure, but doesn't need it.

I'm loving these "sin" posts. :)

@Kori - ah, be honest, the reason you don't want to participate is because you know you'd write a dissertation on wrath. *duck* ;)

Caffeine Court said...

The Gilligan's Island thing is so funny...my husband had the hots for Maryann and not Ginger though.

LunaNik said...

I have to say I'm feeling a bit out of the loop because I seem to be the only gal who posted out of order. Hmph. Must be a middle child's knee jerk reaction to seperate herself from the pack or something like that.


Thanks for playing. I LOVE that vanity isn't a huge issue for you being that you live in LA. Seriously, that says a whole lot about your character girly.

GetSmartGal said...

I did gluttony first also and I am the oldest child. I thought maybe it was because we 1st born think we know what is best for the rest of the kids. :)

I was going to agree with Cable Girl so I looked up the definition of vanity. This is what I found:

Excessive pride in one's appearance or accomplishments; conceit; Implying a state of spiritual emptiness, vanity inspired; Lack of usefulness, worth, or effect; worthlessness

So I can see how the need for validation may fit in here, but I also agree with Cable Girl that the fact that you look to others shows that you may not be vain. I believe that strength is found in recognizing our weaknesses and taking them head on. I am not sure that seeking a little validation is an issue but it sounds like if it is you are taking it head on!

Jen said...

I would call your current choice both brave and pragmatic. ;-)

Tara R. said...

If the need for constant validation is 'vain,' I'm right there beside you.

OHmommy said...

Seriously... GI?

I need to rewatch it all.

I need constant reassurance. Thank goodness my hubby is good at that. In the end, I think we are all the same. No?

Anonymous said...

I often feel like no one needs validation more than I do, and sometimes I wish that I could be super confident in what I am doing.

I feel so exposed with having started R&S, and I am so afraid that no one will want to participate, everyone will be too busy, and that it will ultimately fail. It's still so new that I can't anticipate how it will all turn out.

So yes, I understand the need for validation . . .

Unknown said...

"Hey, here in L.A., my vanity could be a whole lot worse, right?"

True that, sister!

It's cool to see you participating in Terrible Tuesday. Looking forward to your next one :)