Friday, January 11, 2008

Is this year over yet?!?

I'm not real sure if I'm stuck in 2007, or that late 2007 was just a warm-up to the kind of screwed up year that 2008 has turned into so far, but I'm seriously missing two weeks ago!
Two weeks ago, my worst problems were the lack of satellite tv and roofers banging over my head...good times.
Having no entertainment and a pounding headache was a breeze compared to having no heat for 3 days. I may live in SoCal, but it's actually been kind of cold, and I'm a California girl that gets cold when it's below 75! Then, it turned out there was a calm before the emotional storm that Sylvia had over her dad, and while every mother can relate to wanting our children to never be in pain, there's something particularly heart-breaking when the pain is caused by the other "parent" (using that term real loosely).
I know most of the time I try real hard to be that strong, I can do this by myself kind of single parent that is able to provide the emotional support my children need. But right now, I'm just not feeling it. I'm emotionally drained, I've been fighting a cold all week, and I've been literally cold all week. Some days, I just don't have the friggin' energy for this!
So I've been attempting to get through it by trying to find pleasure in the little things. The other day, I had some time to kill between dropping the girls off at school and going back to Sylvia's school for a meeting with the school counselor. I thought, I want to be one of those people you always see at Starbucks who seem to have nothing better to do than to sit around, drinking coffee! Wouldn't you know accident blocked off the entrance to the parking lot and I couldn't get in!
Then, I go to this meeting with the counselor which was just extremely tough emotionally - reliving the entire history of Sylvia and her dad, answering some tough questions about how I've dealt with the situation, listening to Sylvia's problems with me and my parenting...then I get a flat tire. Later that night, I'm trying to veg in front of "Project Runway" and my DVR stopped recording 2 minutes before the end of the show.
That day seemed to be the worst of it, but the days preceding and following haven't been much better.
I realize it's only the first full week of January and all, but if this is how the year's going to go, then I'd like a time machine, please, to transport me to 2009.

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